Fish Fight. (Happy New Year, Iran.) There has been conflict in the DeepDeepDeep these past few days. Tempers are being lost and tensions ratcheted out of the blue and for no apparent reason. Scales fly, and here and there silly arguments erupt at a drop of a hat. The natives are restless. We suspect the usual suspects. You know, they who discovered a while back that is easier and cheaper to destabilize a country than invade it; or, if you really must invade, get some other clown to do it for you. This way you’ll avoid (direct) accusations of being a psychotic bully and of trampling on human rights and international law. Neat trick, if you can swing it. In this here scene the Big Fish is indicting the Little Fish with having sent a postal order for £5 to the Cod Quota Liberation Mafia. Or maybe it was the Free Catalan Burial of the Sardine Cultural Cabal, I forget. The point is that there’s not the tiniest grain of truth in said accusations. The Little Fish hasn’t got two bits of plankton to rub together, let alone a fiver to spare on political movements for which he cares not at all, what! The Big Fish knows that, but he’s been listening to the Today’s Program on Radio4 on an empty stomach and that’s something nobody should ever do, for it is a well-documented fact that doing this can cause mental derangement, brain fuzz and rank paranoia. As a matter of fact, it’s advisable not to listen to the BBC altogether, full stop. And may the sweet Mother of Bumba protect Iran.

Here, have an obscure cultural reference link: